Wonderful Gift

So, here is a little story for you guys, many of whom have never heard this part of the Bean's history.

At the beginning of July of this year my father and sister Sara came to visit Pablo and me. They stayed for about 4 days. The couple months before they came for their visit was a somewhat difficult time for Pablo and I -- we moved into our house and were pretty overwhelmed by all the work that we wanted to do on it, as well as it was a hot summer and Pablo's allergies were in full swing... anyways, it was a little bit of a tense time.

Anyways, one day I took my dad and sister to one of my favorite parts of Chicago, Wicker Park, and we walked around and went into shops, one being my favorite vintage store, Lenny and Me. While in Lenny and Me I came upon the most beautiful (although completely dilapidated) old fashion bassinet and I said, "I don't want kids ever, but if I had a bassinet like this, I might just want to get pregnant to put the baby in it." Needless to say my dad pulled out his phone and started taking photos of it saying, "well if this gets me a grandchild down the road, I'll make it for you."

Well, as the story unfolded, 2 days later I took a pregnancy test (actually I took 2), and sure enough, I was pregnant. (Side note: many of you know that at this point I was about 8 weeks pregnant, and that during the previous 2 months Pablo and I had fought more than our entire 2 years of marriage about if we would have children ever -- me being on the side of no. And sure enough, it was God's little secret that I was already pregnant!).

Anyways, we waited a couple more weeks before revealing the news to the family, and when we did finally tell my dad I made a joke that he needed to get working on that bassinet.

Well, sure enough, he did get working on it. My dad learned (well, he already "knew", but he definitely perfected his skill) how to weld, and set forth the task of welding The Bean's first bed. Needless to say, it is a work of art. He has done an amazing job, and this weekend it is coming to our home! Below is a photo of it that he sent me this morning. I start crying when I see it. It is so beautiful. And, oh man! The road that God has taken me/us on since that first weekend in July on the floor of our bathroom... This has been a wonderful beginning to what will most-assuredly be a wild ride.

weeks 22-24

Hello Hello!

Well the website that I have been referencing to find out the information on how our little baby is growing in comparison to produce really threw me for a loop the other week -- once you reach 22 weeks they only go by month, not week, for updates. I guess that is understandable given that basically everything is formed, now it just needs to gain a little more girth, if you will.

Anyways, I do have an updated for weeks 22-24 (we are currently 1/2 way through our 25th week): Supposedly this month, Month 5, Bean is the size of a papaya. This may very well be, but again, the selection of papaya at my grocery store leaves me to wonder... I mean, look at the size of the thing in the photo! It dwarfs my belly! And, my belly is getting big (more on this in a min).

Ok, so aside from being the size of a "papaya", here is what the Little One has been up to: The baby can now hear outside noise!! Can you believe it?!! (we bought some really good headphones so that when I am sitting and just reading or something the baby can be listening to Mozart and becoming a genius!) Also, nipples have sprouted!! I love it! I love that my baby has nipples right now! Also, that adorable little face that I will get to see in a couple months (holy crap! it's right around the corner!!) is fully formed. And one last thing, the Bean is now snoozing up to 14 hours a day -- which makes sense b/c before I could feel the baby move around every few hours, and now, not so much. But, we are starting to figure out the baby's sleep cycle, and it looks like we have a night owl (Pablo is already asking how we can change this :) ) -- between 7:30 and 8pm it is like a party in there! AND, the baby is getting big enough that you can see my actual belly move sometimes when there is big kick (of course, this is nothing compared to what is to come, but it's still a pretty big development). The baby is supposed to be between 10.5-11.8 in. long and 12.7-20.8 oz.... :)

On a couple of other notes, I am now officially looking for cute pregnancy clothes that are reasonably priced. Well, I should clarify that, I am shopping for tops (thanks to my sister sara, and the emptying of her closet into multiple care packages, I have several pairs of pants that I wear constantly and that fit my ever-expanding hips perfectly). My belly, while it is still on the small time (people are constantly reminding me of this and how I haven't even begun to experience The Belly), is already getting in the way -- bending over, putting on my shoes, getting in out of the car (this is the worst so far), all these things are becoming more and more difficult. In addition, the number of trips I take to the bathroom is becoming comical to the men at my work, as well as my husband.

We only have 3 more weeks in our Bradley Birth class (this class has been amazing! If you are planning on doing a natural child birth in the future, I DEFINITELY recommend this class while you are pregnant), and have begun to work on our Birth Plan, relaxation techniques, and birthing positions that will enable the baby to better "engage in my pelvis"... it is all very intense and overwhelming stuff, I assure you, but I am feeling more and more confident about it, especially with Pablo being so supportive.

Ok, well I think that is more than enough for a "brief" update on the growing family here in Chicago, IL. Love you all!

My Husband Cracks Me UP!!!

so, i'm at work (i work in a small office with all men, and it is very quite all the time), and i see there is an email from my husband to his family with this as the subject line "Who can make the ugliest face? Let's keep sending some to each other...."

so, i scroll down through his dad and his sister's reply and find these photos attached...

needless to say i burst out laughin in my very quite, full of men, office....

makes me also wonder the purpose of these so called "office hours" my husband is supposedly doing every day.... :)

i love my man and how he makes me laugh!

Banana Photo

Here is the banana photo (clearly we are talking about how long the baby is now)...

Also, with regards to people's comments on the hair: I am starting to feel fat (I know, I know, I'M PREGNANT), and since retail therapy is pretty much not an option I decided to chop the hair since it would give me a much-needed change. While the straight hair looks great and is beyond simple (it literally take me about 3 min to get it ready once i'm out of the shower), the curly hair (which takes a whopping 7 min. longer to get ready) is much much cuter... Thank you to Pablo for being so understanding and being ok with me chopping off my hair. :)

week 20 & 21

OK, so again, I am a week behind (I will update both week 20 and 21 today), but I also come with more updates, not just baby-centered.

Week 20: Cantaloupe!!!

Holy Crap! clearly from the photo below I do not think that I have a cantaloupe-sized baby in my uterus!! But then again, both my stomach and my bladder are shrinking considerably, so the space is filling up with something... And here is what The Bean was up to during that week: Bean's digestive system is busy creating meconium (a tarry black substance made of swallowed amniotic fluid, digestive secretion and dead cells), which will fill the first diaper after birth. And, the baby's genitals are now FULLY formed!!! The Bean is appx. 6.5 in long and 10.6 oz. crazy huh? doesn't sound like much but I have seen what 10 cm dilation looks like, and that is serious business... clearly The Bean bulks up later on in the pregnancy to necessitate such a large opening to squeeze through.

Pablo has been able to feel The Bean kick a couple times, which is still so cool and new to us both!

Week 21: Banana!

The Bean is now appx. 10.5 in long, weighing 12.7oz (where they come up with this weight measurement, really beats me). Here is what has happened this past week: The Bean has been downing amniotic fluid every day, both for hydration and nutrition and to practice swallowing and digesting. And, these days, those taste buds actually work! Like I said before, I have heard that babies like the foods that their mothers eat while they are inside, so it will be interesting to see what The Bean's faves are when born. :) Sadly, I do not have the photo to upload for the banana, but I will do it tomorrow.

Here are some photos from our ultrasound as well...

can you believe these!!!!

Along with growing a baby, Pablo and I have been very busy that last few weekends trying to get our house fully ready for the baby. Here are some things (not too exciting, so keep your expectations low) that we have documented (we have done a lot that we have not documented, so don't think we have been lazy!):

1. Pablo installed a dog door for the girls yesterday -- this is wonderful! it took the girls some getting used to, but chicken and rice treats really do a wonder with training. :)

2. yesterday I painted the red stripes on one of The Bean's walls. The ceiling will have black and white checkers, and the other 3 walls will be dark grey. I am SUPER excited about how the room is coming together!

3. we bought beds for the girls (they have been sleeping in our room lately -- I was sick and tired of having their huge crates in our living room for them to sleep every night -- originally on just spare blankets, but we decided to upgrade). we brought the beds in and put one on the couch (where both girls like to hang out sometimes) and immediately Laila hopped up in one and hung out in it the rest of the day. it was a little ridiculous, but at least it has been a hit! :) You can see the dark grey walls in the background -- we painted 3 walls in our living room last weekend (once I have put up the artwork this week I will post what the whole room looks like -- so far in my head it will be AMAZING!!).

Week 19: Mango!!

Well, according to my weekly update, The Bean wasn’t incredibly active this week in any new exciting development. I mean, the baby is now covered in vernix (a white substance made of baby hair, oil and dead skin cells) which protects it from the amniotic fluid, but other than that, they didn’t tell me anything more exciting. But, The Bean is now the size of a mango – and my belly is definitely popped out now (no more beer belly for anna). (please excuse Laila's crazy eyes in this photo)...

I can give you some other, not technically developmental, updates on how Baby Bean and I are doing/growing…
1. I am definitely feeling the baby move all over the place. Typically around 3:30pm or so is when the most movement happens. Pablo was even able to feel a kick (or punch) on Saturday evening as we were watching TV. It was very cool.
2. My belly is big. This weekend we started painting the baby’s room and I was sitting on the floor doing the baseboards and my boobs literally rest on my belly and i started to sweat there – this is something completely foreign to me.
3. A couple weekends ago Pablo and I went and did our baby registry – thank goodness Gillian Lawson (baby extraordinaire) went with us. I swear, when we walked in to Babies R Us, I literally was like “what the heck is all this sh*t?!” Had she not come, Pablo and I would have not only had nothing on our registry, but we would have gotten into a gigantic fight, I just know it. But, both of these things were averted. Not only did we register for the things that we needed, we learned about things we had no idea to ask for i.e.: a rectal thermometer. It ended up being a great time and got me really excited about doing the baby’s room. Pablo’s parents already went on the register and bought us our car seat (which was delivered last week), so we have a car set in our house… this is for real folks!
4. Pablo and I went and watched the move “Life as We Know It” (if you haven’t heard of it go to you tube and watch a trailer), it was hysterical! We both laughed really hard throughout the film, but when we left I was in tears because I feel so unprepared. I guess it’s a good thing that we still have just over 4 months to prepare of this little baby. :)

Well, I think that is about a good an update as any. Pablo and I have been working very very hard the last couple of weekends to get things on our house “to do” list done (we painted both the living room and the dinner room as well as started on the baby room)… so I will be putting up photos of those – that is, as soon as we take them… :/
If you choose to pray for us, please pray for us and that God would just allow us to have more time together, both to do things on the house, but also to just be together and to nurture our relationship and prepare for the arrival of this baby. Life has become quite overwhelming and stressful and it’s so easy to just sit in front of the TV instead of investing in one another. We would definitely appreciate it.

Love to all of you!

Week 18 photo

Alright, so it's a couple days late (I don't get on the internet during the weekend) but here is the picture from last week, week 18.

A couple of notes: 1. yes, we took the photo in the middle of the grocery store (I didn't want to buy just one russet potato, and I already had my menu for the week planned out) -- thus, it's not the best picture of the belly to produce ration. 2. the week was supposed to be a sweet potato, but the sweet potatoes at our local produce shop must have been on steroids because they were about as big as my head -- and no way is Baby Bean that big -- thus, we had to imporvise.

All that said, here is week 18:

Growing Growing Growing!!!

Alright, I have a confession to make -- I screwed up how many weeks along I am! Already, making mistakes, not a good sign. Basically somewhere I skipped a week, so, we are going to skip on of the produce photos and just combine the developmental facts into one photo... So, with that said, a week an a half ago, week 16/17 the baby was the size of an Avocado!

And here's what Baby Bean was doing during that time:

Bean's ears are forming and can now pick up my voice!!! Can you believe it?!! The Bean has also already begun growing eyebrows and lashes, and even forming taste buds! (I hear that babies tend to like what their mother's eat while they are pregnant -- if this is true, The Bean will be partial to blueberry bagels, vanilla yogurt, asperagus, neopolitan ice cream, and green bell peppers, among other things :) ). In addition, Bean's skeleton is hardening, changing from rubbery cartilage to bone, and fat is finally accumulating around it. The umbilical cord is getting thicker and stronger, and those little fingers and toes are now topped by one-of-a-kind prints. Already, fingerprints!! Can you believe it?!!

We just finished week 18, and the Bean was the size of a sweet potato (still one of my favorite foods) -- the photo will be posted after we take it tonight. But, here is what The Bean did last week: Bean has become extremely mobile, passing the hours yawning, hiccuping, rolling, twisting, kicking, punching, sucking and swallowing. Supposedly the baby's finally big enough for me to begin feeling the movements soon -- there have been a couple of times when I have said, "Hmm, that was an interesting feeling -- was that you, Bean, or was that just gas?") So, I cannot confirm or deny if I have, in fact, felt the baby move yet, but I'm sure I will some day soon!!

And, in 2 days we get to find out if we are having a boy or a girl, I am almost beside myself with anticipation!!!

Wonderful Weekend

The past couple of weeks have been very very stressfull at work for me -- we are getting audited by the SEC (which is kind of like the IRS for what we do). Anyways, my main jobi s making sure that our records and our procedures are compliant with federal regulations -- a pretty easy task, that is until I have pull it all together and make sure that all the wholes are filled and everything is perfect because these guys have the power to shut us down. Thus, the last couple of weeks have been quite stressful preparing for this week when the auditors are in our office.

So, that laid the groundwork for this weekend. Friday I took off early after I had done all I could for the audit (at this point my brain had literally shut down and would not work any more). I ran some errands and then finished getting my house ready for a very special guest who was coming in later that night.

At 8:30pm that evening I picked my dad up from the airport. :)

We had a wonderful weekend. Saturday we went to the Museum of Science and Industry (thanks to the Chicago Public Library, we were able to check out free passes for each of us, so we only paid for the special exhibits that we wanted to see). This museum is AMAZING!! we did 2 special exhibits: 1. we toured a captured German U-Boat -- that was really really cool (it was especially cool to hear my dad whisper little facts here and there that the tour guide didn't know/include. it's great having a dad who knows so much about so many things :) ). 2. we watched an IMAX about the universe from photographs taken by the Huble Space Station (we got to see stars being born, the death of stars, millions of galaxies, etc. it was beyond amazing). God really is beyond comprehension.

Next, we went to get Chicago Deep Dish pizza at Lou Malnatti's then we went home. When we got home, my dad installed a light in my kitchen that I asked him to make frmo scratch (i will post a photo later), and then we watched a movie.

Sunday we went to church, ran some errands, drove to the subburbs to check out a vintage fair, and then came home a tackeled a few projects I wanted to get taken care of (like, fixing a hinge on my closet door, hanging some branches on my dining room wall, replacing all the brass knobs in our kitchen with the champagne corks I have been preparing for a few weeks, and some other random things).

The weekend was a wonderful weekend. It was definitely way too short, if you ask me. My dad blesses us so much when he comes to visit. Not only is he one of my favorite people in the world and I love getting to spend time with him, but (and it's pretty selfish to say maybe) it's pretty great that his love language is acts of service. While I didn't have him doing major projects this time, the fact that he helped us make the house pretty and more like a home, really made my feel incredibly loved. And, it's so wonderful to watch him and Pablo interact and watch how my dad enjoys teaching Pablo how to do some of the handyman things.

All in all, it was the perfect way to end 2 weeks of stress, and to relax me enough to head into this week with the auditors.

Week 14 and 15

Dang!! I am so sorry for not posting the update of Baby Bean the last couple of weeks -- let me tell you, the last couple weeks have been so busy and very stressful. But of course, no excuse. Thanks to several of you who have been staying on top of me, here are the updates.

Week 14: Baby Bean is the size of a lemon!!

This week The Bean started sucking his/her thumb (so stinking cute to think about!! but already i'm worried that based on his/her parent's luck with braces, this is a habit that we will have to break ASAP to avoid a similar outcome, if possible, for the little guy!) and wiggling his/her toes. again, I repeat, so stinking cute!! In addition, The Bean's kidneys, liver, and spleen are continuing to develop. And, the baby grew hair for warmth is week! (this is not the type of hair that he/she will come out with. he/she will loose it while still in the womb).

As for me, during this week I can with out a doubt say that I am already falling head-over-heels in love with the life growing in my belly. I am actually getting really really excited (aliebit terrified) to by a mom.

As for weird things happening with me -- during week 14 my belly button was no longer centered (don't worry, as The Bean grew during week 15, the the button straightened out again). Also, my pants began to get very tight this week.

Week 15: Baby Bean is the size of a Orange!!

Can you believe how The Bean is growing!! This week The Bean is getting to be more porportionate: the legs are finally longer than the arms! way to go Bean -- keep them legs growing like Mama's!!! (but, be kind to her tummy when you are "readjusting"/trying out for the World Cup). Speaking of kicking (while I have not felt the baby kick yet) all 4 joints are working and he/she is supposedly wiggling and squirming away. I can't wait to feel that first little inner nudge. It's supposed to happen any week.

As for me, during week 15, the pants I was able to wear at all diminished to 2 pairs thus, I went shopping and bought a couple that were 2 sizes bigger! My belly isn't incredibly big, nor will it realyl affect my pants waist I think, but my hips have started opening up which is where the bigger pants have come in. It's difficult to find the right pair though b/c while my hips are wider, and I have a little belly, I'm still the skinny Anna which makes for difficult pant shopping.

In addition, Pablo and I went to our first birth class last night (we are doing the Bradley Method). I left feeling pretty overwhelmed, but very excited about all the prep-work we will do during this next 12-week class. In addition to information and prep about the birth and how Pablo will be my coach, I am also learning the stretches/exercises that will help my body prep for the whole ordeal, as well as how to practice relaxing different parts of my body. It's all veyr informative.

Pablo and I have begun to discus the Baby's room, which I could not be more excited about!! We are also talking about me not going back to work 6 weeks after the baby is born (which was the original plan) but rather me staying home with the baby -- something I never EVER thought we would talk about/consider, but the fact is, I'm already in love. I can't imagine leaving this tiny beautiful daughter/son of mine only 6 weeks after meeting him/her. Man! how things have changed in my heart in the last couple of months. Yes, it may be hormones, but I think God made women get those hormones for a definite reason.

Anyways, I will try to post more regularly. Hopefully the next couple of weeks will calm down significantly.

Ps. we find out the sex of the baby on Sept. 30th (that is if he/she is cooperative) :)

Love you all!!

Week 13

Well, we are on to week 13.
This week, Baby Bean is the size of a peach, and doing some amazing things!!

Baby Bean's own unique finger prints are now fully in place (unbelievable!!). Also, by this time the sex genitalia are fully formed and visible, but may still be difficult to see in a ultrasound. But, continuing with that vein of thought, if Baby Bean is a girl, she already has 2million eggs!! By the time she is born that number will decrease to 1million, and by the time she is 17 that number will decrease to about 200K, but that's still a lot of eggs if you ask me!

Also, during this 4th month, Baby Bean will triple in size and quadruple in weight!!! We are heading into the big growth spurts now.

Also, Baby Bean's vocal chords are fully formed. Which, led me to cry the other night when it occurred to me that when Baby Bean is born and cries for the first time, that might actually not be the first time he/she cries. I mean, he/she will more than likely cry while in my belly -- that thought breaks my heart. I'm doing the best I can to make sure that Baby Bean is safe, happy, and growing as healthy as possible -- I don't want him/her to cry, especially when I can't hear it to do anything about it. This thought totally broke my heart when it occurred to me. And, when I shared it to Pablo (not to put him in a bad light or anything), he being ultra-pragmatic and literal said, "Anna, crying requires air to move through the vocal chords, and right now the baby is no breathing air, but getting oxygen from the water in the womb"... My reaction to this was to spat back "while that is a total rational explanation, how the hell do you know?!"

Anyways, I have since accepted the fact that I'm doing the best that I can, and if Baby Bean is going to cry, then we will just have to deal with that when he/she comes out.

Hope you guys enjoy these updates!!

Also, i will soon be posting some updates that I have been checking off my list for the house (it is finally coming together little by little). So, stay tuned for those as well.

Official Annoucement

Hello Friends!

Well, most, if not all, of you have heard the big news, but we are now making it officially public news...

Pablo and I are very much, 100%, no kidding around, pregnant! We are 13 weeks along (we found out 2 months into it).

As many of you know about me, I have never been crazy, or even sold on the idea of having children. In fact, ironically, the 2 months while we were unknowingly pregnant Pablo and I fought more about if we would ever have children (me being on the "let's not" side) than our entire last 2 years of marriage. So, needless to say, these few weeks have been a time of MAJOR adjustment.

I will tell you though, things are going very very well. We are growing steadly more and more excited about the arrival of Baby Bean (due Feb. 22, and named "Baby Bean" because when we discovered that we were pregnant, the baby was the size of a kidney bean). We heard the heartbeat last week which shattered my world almost -- still cannot fathom that I am sustaining a life, it makes my life that much more vital to maintain! -- but hearing the heart beating so fast in my belly, that sound has kept me a bit anchored in the reality that yes we are pregnant, no I am not just putting on a ridiculous amount of weight in my mid-section, and yes, in 9 months, I'm pussing a watermelon out of my very tiny body...

But serisouly, I think the most miraculous thing about being pregnant (aside from being nearly impossible to comprehend on a day-to-day basis) is that I have started to fall very much in love with this tiny life inside me. My world is shifting. My dreams have not changed, but they will definitely be delayed, and oddly enough, I'm more than ok with that. These are miraculous things to be coming out of my mouth friends -- afterall, I'm very selfish (another thing this baby is already teaching me -- stupidly I have gotten frustrated at it being inside me simply because its presence means no sushi, something I am NOT fond of at all!!).

So, without any further ado, I would like to introduce you to the newest Otaola in the making, week by week as we both grow! (sorry, I only have the last couple weeks of photographs on my computer at work, which is where I am, so that is all you get at the moment).



Week 11: Baby Bean is the size of a strawaberry -- this week the arm and leg joints began to form and work

Week 12: Baby Bean is the size of a lime -- this week (end of the first trimester) the Bean began to move his/her limbs (i didn't feel it though), his skin began to respond to touch!, her intestines that were previously in the umbilical chord (who knew!) began to move into the abnominal cavity, his eyelids began to grow and fuse together, she is swollowing, and he is pancrious is beginning to secrete urine which is released into the amniotic fluid! Baby Bean has been hard at work!!!

This week is Week 13 -- stay tuned this weekend for the newest picture and developmental updates!!

Love you guys!

Electric Bill

The last couple of months our electric bill has been exorbidantly high and definitely was not helping our pocketbook at all. I started examining our bill because I didn't think we used significant more electricity in the last 2 months. Turns out that our bill was now being "estimated" not given an actual read. What normally is about $50-$70/month in the summer was $160 2 months ago and $120 last month. Anyways, I figured out how to read our meter myself and report the usage online... our bill is only $70 this month!

ridiculous! how much money are these compies making off of people who aren't paying any attention?!

Anyways, it may sound like a stupid thing to blog about, but that just made my day.

Best Sound Ever

After almost 9 days of not being able to speak to Pablo (he was on a wilderness adventure in the Boundary Waters in Minnesota with some Young Life kids), he just called!!!

I don't think I have ever been so elated to see his face pop up on my phone caller ID, or to hear his voice on the opposite end of the phone.

I have missed him so incredibly much this week -- it has definitely been a pretty difficult few days to get through.

But, now he is heading back to Chicago (should get here in the middle of the night) and later this week we are heading for a brief vacation to San Francisco for my 25th birthday -- I could not be happier right now!

If only the next 12-14 hours (the amount of time it will take him to get here) would be over already!!!

ummm....

my dog, paisley, had explosive diaherra last night....

enough said.

Kitchen Update

Well, things are finally starting to get rolling again at our house (we have had a few bumps, maybe more like massive-potholes-that-have-caused-flat-tires-and-then-the-AAA-truck-was late-type of problems), and things are looking up.

Over the week before Memorial Day, Pablo and I went and picked out the 2 slabs that would be used for our granite countertops, they were fabricated, and today they delivered them!!!!

While I have not been at home to inspect them myself, I am VERY pleased with the photos that Pablo emailed to me. Here are a couple:

(I absolutely LOVE my stove -- it has the 5th center burner it is fabulous!!)

Anyways, I think they look great. Originally I was scarred that they might not look the best with white cabinets, but once we paint the walls, I think they will look great!

Since the counters have bits of red in them, I am planning on painted our walls a dark green with white trim... I am going make my own backsplash out of wine corks, as well as my own drawer pulls out of champange corks... And several other ideas that will make this kitchen my masterpiece.... I AM SOOOOO EXCITED!!!

Next up on the renovation list: get all the electrical wired and all the MASSIVE wholes in every wall in every room finally patched so that we can actually unpack and I can finally begin to make this house a *beautiful* home!

Oh man, I'm excited to get home tonight and unpack my kitchen into the cabinets (who would have thought that that type of thing would make my week?!!)

Anyone up for painting sometime?

4650 W. Montana Street

Well, I have put this off long enough... i was wanting to wait and put up some cute photos announcing it, but alas, Pablo has not given the photos to me, and it has gone on too long.

All that to say, we are proud proud home owners (for about a month now in fact)!!!

I cannot tell you how much I am in love with our place. Yes, were without water for the first week of living there (luckily we still had access to our apartment -- so every morning i would have to hold my pee until we drove to the apartment to get ready... it was a hard week. let's just leave it at that). And yes, we have hit some pretty significant bumps, like the plumbing in our bathroom has caused us some trouble -- stories for another time -- and Pablo has had to quickly learn new skills such as plumbing. And yes, we lived off of microwave dinners and take out for about 3 weeks while we waited to buy a stove (all our big appliances were to be bough through our rehab loan -- we are doing some remodleing to the house and that is apart of our mortgage loan -- it's not nearly as complicated as it sounds. but getting the funding from the bank is!). But, now we have an AMAZING stove, the bathroom is at least functional, we have ordered our kitchen countertops, and our cabinets are being installed this week.

but let me back up a bit -- we bought a house on a quite corner. we have a double lot, which means that for city standards, we have a lot of land (yay for the dogs to have a big back yard!). It is a 3 bedroom, 1 bath house with a full basement. Pablo basically owns the basement -- one day it will be a great place for young life kids to hang out. I have my studio in the second floor. And we have a guest bedroom -- so there is plenty of space for you all to come and stay!

The highlight of living there so far (aside from discovering that there is a sewer cap actually on my property -- I swear, God must have just giggled to himself when setting that one! i mean seriously, the girl who loves sewer caps now owns one!!!) is when we torn up the disgusting brown carpet on the stairs and found BEAUTIFUL wood stairs underneath. Granted, there is a lot of paint and stain to be stripped off the wood, but they will be incedible when they are finished.

ok, so there is so much more i could write about being a home owner and how i go around and just hug a door jam or run my hand along a wall and say "i own you"... it is quite the feeling. but, i will leave you with that.

and i promise to upload photos of before and after of the place as it progresses.

ps. here is the address

4650 W. Montana Street
Chicago, IL 60639

Candles, Wine, Connection

After a rather eventful few days (if you haven't heard via Pablo's constant Facebook updates and picture postings, Pablo and I put a bid on a wonderful house we are hoping to purchase!!!), Valentine's Day, and then my brother and his girlfriend staying at our house Monday night, it left very little time for Pablo and I to relax and just be.

Well, I have a wonderful husband. I got home last night to find the dishes in the sink clean, the house picked up, candles lit, and 1 glasses of wine sitting out on our coffee table (or trunk I should say). We spent the next hour or so just sitting and talking -- it was wonderful. I mean, I talk to Pablo more than I talk to anyone, but it had been a while since we had actually talked WITH each other, instead of just AT each other, if that makes sense... We connected, and it was wonderful!

And, to top it off, we found out that the seller of the house we bid on accepted our offer!!! so, we just have to hear back from the bank if they accept it as well... We should know by the end of the week if we are on the road to being proud homeowners... EEEEEE!!!

Shocking New Development

I like coffee...

Did you guys hear that? I like coffee -- in fact, I drink at least 1 cup a day!! This shocks me! I have hated coffee, even when I worked at a coffee shop I hated it. And now, I like it! Partly because I make it taste like coffee ice cream (so some of you might scoff at the me and say I don't actually like coffee and this is only child's play), but also because it is warm -- and living in a cold place nowadays, makes me like hot coffee all the more.

Now, if only I could grow to like tea -- it still tastes to me like I am drinking water that tastes like grass.

Anyways, I know, it's nothing profoud, just an update on a way I have changed in the last few months.

I miss my husband

As some of you know, my husband has been out of town for 2 weeks -- away on New Staff Training for Young Life. I have been gone from him (is that how you would word that statement? I don't know...) for 2 weeks -- when I was in Santa Barbara working in October -- but it felt nothing like this. Here are some reasons why I miss my husband so much:

1. making food for 1 person is really depressing (at least after being used to doing it for 2 people for a year and a half) and hard to do without wasting food
2. getting warm when I first get into bed is much harder
3. getting warm in the middle of the night is much harder
4. putting the last two factors together, that means I have put the heater up higher which means our gas bill will be higher
5. being a single parent sucks!!! Honestly, these girls are driving me crazy!!
6. The hour difference makes it really late for us to talk because when he is done with class or with playing in the ping pong competition or the basketball competition, I am already in bed which makes for some very quick and superficial conversations -- leaving me very unsatisfied!
7. I have to get up a good 20 to 25 min earlier because normally when Pablo is here, he takes care of taking the girls out to the bathroom, feeding them, and getting the car started to warm up, while I finish getting ready. Let me tell you, for those of you who know me, you know how I LOVE my sleep and how I am NOT a morning person, so this combination does not make me happy.
8. Curling up and watching TV before I go to bed just isn't as cozy and fun without him.

I know, I know, these all sound very superficial and selfish of me. I just really hate doing life without him like this. He is my favorite person to be around, and I love doing the daily meanial tasks with him.

I MISS HIM!!!!!!

Thank goodness he comes home tomorrow evening!

i'm not angry anymore!

the last few months have been pretty challenging for me -- emotionall, metally, and definitely spiritually. basically i have been really really angry with God.

i have been angry about so many things, but biggest of all was that i didn't feel like God cared about me -- not only did i feel like He wasn't listening to my prayers, but that He had forgotten about me all together.

then, as you have read in an earlier post, I heard (and more importantly i believed what i heard) that He had heard my heart's cry(ies). and even though that was a wonderful and completely uplifting and reguvinating day for me, my abilty to say "i am no longer angry" came a couple weeks later.

as some of you know, i am doing 2 beth moore bible studies (one with my church and the other with my sister and friend via skype). both are very challenging, and i feel the stings of my heart being stretch as i press deeper into him.

during one of my quite times with the bible study on faith/believing, i was filled so full with the knowledge that the LORD loves me, that it led me to have tears streaming down my face, and left me bubbling over wanting to tell pablo and the girls i do the study with, and you guys all about it.

it came from a verse in Psalm 139:17 (the whole chapter is wonderful, but primarily v. 13-17)
"How precious are your thoughts about me,
O, God.
They are innumerable."

friends, this verse was meant for me. not only did i need to know that He hadn't forgotten about me, but His thoughts about me are, in fact, innumerable! can you imagine!!!

and then beth moore wrote these words, "God... bid your heart to beat. For many days He alone know you existed. You were His secret." i read each of the phrases one tiny word at a time, and then i read them over and over again. i couldn't read them enough. i just let them soak in until i was waterlogged with them!

friends, i have never felt more loved by the LORD. as corny as it may sound, i still walk around smiling and almost crying at the thought that He bid my heart to beat; that i was, and still am, His secret.

so, i can say that i am no longer angry. i mean, afterall, i am His secret.